Before my husband and I were even a couple, he once asked me what I’d do if I ever really liked someone. I wasn’t known for liking people very much, but I’d thought about it enough to answer.
“I’d get married,” I texted.
“That’s pretty traditional for a nontraditional girl,” he wrote back.
“Well,” I replied, “I don’t believe in sitting on the fence. And I definitely don’t need a boyfriend. Plus, I’d marry the person over and over.”
I hit send – then spent the next 15 minutes explaining what I meant. I didn’t want one massive wedding with one massive price tag and the pressure of making everything perfect in a single day. If I ever married, I wanted the freedom to do it again and again because the 10th time would feel different than the first.
At the time, it sounded like a quirky theory. Twelve years later, it’s become the way I understand marriage.
So far, I’ve married my husband five times. Though we’ve only done it once legally, each time we exchange vows I learn something new about myself and our relationship.
The first time was at a courthouse. I cried the entire way through.
After we moved in together, my husband pr...
English (US)